Tuesday, October 19, 2010

a lot waiting.

i look to my feet when i am down. because for some reason they've managed to find themselves no longer on the ground. and my hands are trying to do the walking so that i can get some place other than the sky. because my adventurous spirit ran out when i said goodbye. but for some reason, my feet remember. remember what it was like to run so fast they left the ground. to feel so light that they didn't need to touch earth to move. but a ball of lead has made my stomach its permanent home and i can't seem to digest my loneliness...my fear...and all the changes the same way i usually do. and so i sink. and i let the lead seep in and grow roots. but. my feet remember. and so they force me on my hands and make me uncomfortable so that i'll remember. remember what it is like to be here and be free. and so that i'll deal with that ball of lead because sinking turns into suffocating at this angle and i've got far too much waiting for me to give up. and give in.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

i live in new zealand.

just an awesome treehouse at camp

my flatemate lex in the distance you can see the south island

the waikanae coast

beautiful flowers

i live in waikanae, new zealand and i am starting a discipleship program at this camp. i don't know exactly what is going to happen or what is going to come of this but i am extremely excited.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

summer memories/realities

from children running through sweet pea fields
getting caught on hidden blackberry bushes
the thorns gouging deep
and tangling on summer skin
too busy to stop and tend the wounds,
the blood leaving a trail
in case we want to go back
but even if we do,
we won't go back the same way
you can never go back the same way,
we aren't those children,
the field will be gone,
and we'll come back slower.
why is the sky so much bigger here?
anywhere else it would be a normal sunny day,
but here,
with you,
it is epic and life changing
making it easy to remember
lavender scented memories
and sea salt in my hair.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

oh yeah.

i live in new zealand right now. yup. it is wednesday at 10:03pm and it is most likely 2:03am on wednesday where you are. but yeah. i live in waikanae, new zealand for the next 7 months. pictures and plans and poems to follow.